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Construction Definitions |
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- ENGINEER'S ESTIMATE: The cost of construction in heaven.
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- BID: A wild guess carried out to two decimal places.
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- BID OPENING: A poker game in which the winning hand loses.
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- LOW BIDDER: A contractor who is wondering what he left out.
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- CONTRACTOR: A gambler who never gets to shuffle, cut or deal.
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- PROJECT MANAGER: The conductor of an orchestra in which every musician is in a different union.
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- STRIKE: An effort to increase egg production by strangling the chicken.
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- COMPLETION DATE: The point at which liquidated damages begin.
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- LIQUIDATED DAMAGES: A penalty for failing to achieve the impossible.
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- AUDITOR: People who go in after the war is lost and bayonet the wounded.
- LAWYER: People who go in after the auditors and strip the bodies.
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- DELAYED PAYMENT: A tourniquet applied at the pockets.
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