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Construction Definitions |
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- ENGINEER'S ESTIMATE: The cost of construction in heaven.
- BID: A wild guess carried out to two decimal places.
- BID OPENING: A poker game in which the winning hand loses.
- LOW BIDDER: A contractor who is wondering what he left out.
- CONTRACTOR: A gambler who never gets to shuffle, cut or deal.
- PROJECT MANAGER: The conductor of an orchestra in which every musician is in a different union.
- STRIKE: An effort to increase egg production by strangling the chicken.
- COMPLETION DATE: The point at which liquidated damages begin.
- LIQUIDATED DAMAGES: A penalty for failing to achieve the impossible.
- AUDITOR: People who go in after the war is lost and bayonet the wounded.
- LAWYER: People who go in after the auditors and strip the bodies.
- DELAYED PAYMENT: A tourniquet applied at the pockets.
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